It Started With a Meeting
by Christine M. Greenleaf
Summary: Poison Ivy claims that the events in "Batman: Arkham Knight" started with a meeting of all the supervillains. This is my take on what that meeting was probably like. Minor spoilers from "Batman: Arkham Knight" (Go play it - it's awesome! :-)


**It Started With a Meeting**

Jonathan Crane turned as the door opened. "Scarecrow, you have a visitor," said the Arkham Knight.

"Send them in," said Crane.

The Arkham Knight nodded, and then held the door open for a beautiful blonde young woman, dressed in red and black leggings and a black, tutu dress. She wore white face paint, but her eye makeup was streaming from where she had clearly been crying. Nevertheless, she forced a smile.

"Hello, Johnny," she whispered. "It's good to see you again."

"Harley!" gasped Crane, his heart leaping at the sight of her. "Thank you, you may leave us," he said, waving his hand at the Arkham Knight. "She's no danger. Oh, Harley, how have you been?" he asked.

Tears filled her beautiful blue eyes again. "Oh, Johnny!" she sobbed, throwing herself into his arms and wailing. "I miss him so much!"

"I know, my dear," he whispered, stroking her hair. "I know. I heard. I'm so very sorry for your loss."

"The grief…just doesn't go away, Johnny," whispered Harley, hugging him. "It doesn't get any better, the emptiness, the loneliness…he was my whole world, Johnny! And now he's gone! And if you knew how hard it is to carry on when your heart is gone…"

"Hush now, my dear," he said, soothingly. "I know. Believe me, I know."

She continued to sob. "The nights are the worst," she whispered. "When you're lying alone, in an empty bed, the big city all around you, full of danger and pain and fear…and nobody to protect you and hold you and tell you it's all right…"

"It _is_ all right, my dear," he said gently. "I have a plan, you'll see. We'll destroy the Batman once and for all, and you can have revenge for the man you loved. That will help, I promise."

She nodded, lifting her face to smile at him. "You're always…so comforting, Johnny. So strong. I'm not afraid when you're around."

She lifted a hand to his face. "I'm sorry…about what happened to your face," she murmured.

"Oh, it's fine," he said, shrugging. "It was quite painful at the time, but in retrospect it suits a man like me to have a horrific face. Although I still shan't be inviting Killer Croc to the meeting to destroy Batman," he said, with a wry smile.

She smiled back. "And you're still the same old Johnny on the inside, I see," she murmured. "I'm so glad. I need a friend, a real friend, now more than ever. And you've always been my real friend, Johnny…"

She stared at him, tears trailing down her face, and then slowly lifted a hand to undo the buckles on the top of her dress.

"Harley, what are you…" he began, but she put her free hand to his lips.

"I told you, I need…a real friend. And the nights have just been so lonely, Johnny," she whispered. "So lonely…"

She drew the top of her dress down, revealing her heaving bosom as she gazed up at him, offering herself to him. And Crane was not crazy enough to refuse, seizing her in his arms and slamming her against the wall, planting feverish kisses all over her.

"Take me, Johnny!" she gasped, wrapping her legs around his skinny form and crushing his body against her. "With Mr. J gone, you're the man I want! Just take me now!"

"Oh, Harley!" he gasped. "I never thought you would ever say those words to me! It's almost…like a dream come true…"

A loud knocking on the door woke Crane suddenly. "Dammit!" he roared, sitting up in bed and rubbing his eyes.

"Sir? It's time," said the Arkham Knight, opening the door.

"Yes, yes, I'll be right there!" snapped Crane, trying to salvage a few brief memories of the dream before it faded away forever.

Crane had been away from Gotham for a while – he had suffered an accident in the sewers beneath Arkham Asylum. Well, it had been an accident on his part, but a very deliberate mauling by Killer Croc which resulted in his face needing complete reconstructive surgery. An accident that had been caused by Batman. And now Crane was going to get revenge on him by making him suffer the ultimate humiliation. He was going to break down Gotham's hero and show the city the face of nothing more than a man, cowering in terror. He was going to destroy Batman once and for all by destroying his legacy.

But he couldn't do it alone. While he was away from Gotham, he had made the acquaintance of a vigilante calling himself the Arkham Knight, who pledged huge quantities of military troops to the cause. But Crane knew Batman, and he knew even with a whole army to challenge him, Batman would somehow emerge triumphant. They needed yet more allies. And that was what he had called the meeting for.

He had invited the best supervillains of Gotham to his lair, in an effort to unite them under a common cause – the destruction of Batman. If anything could unite the squabbling bunch of egomaniacs, that was it. The old rivalries from Arkham City and before still burned strongly in the memory of all those attending today, but Crane was confident that he could persuade them. He was the superior intellect of everyone there, even Nygma, although he liked to think otherwise. And the others weren't totally irrational people – true, they were lunatics, but they could be reasoned with. Not like the Joker. Things were so much easier now that he was gone.

Everyone had been happy to hear about the Joker's death – Crane actually laughed when he read about it in the paper. And then he had stopped laughing when he saw the picture of Harley Quinn underneath the headline, indescribable pain and heartbreak in her eyes. She had been the only person upset by the Joker's passing. Crane hadn't seen her in person since he had been back, (although he had delegated her for a special mission to rescue Poison Ivy from prison in Bludhaven) but he heard that she was doing her best to put on a brave face. In public, anyway.

It was far too soon after the clown's passing to declare his feelings for her, thought Crane as he dressed. He could wait. Eventually Harley had to get over the monster, after all, and then he could make his move. First Gotham would be his, and then Harley. And then his triumph would be complete.

He took a seat in the meeting room and glanced at his watch. He didn't really expect supervillains to be punctual, but tardiness was just plain rude. It was all very well being evil, but rudeness was really beyond the pale…

"Get away from me, you wanker!" shouted a familiar, unpleasant voice. Crane sighed, rolling his eyes.

"Strong language is also beyond the pale," he muttered under his breath as the door opened and Oswald Cobblepot, the Penguin entered, closely followed by Two-Face.

"It's a free country, Oswald," snapped Two-Face. "And I was invited to this gathering same as you! Though I honestly don't know why Crane would want anything to do with a little freak like you…"

"Yeah, a guy with his face split in half and who can't make decisions without flipping a coin is a much better bet for an associate," snapped Penguin.

"Gentlemen, please," said Crane, in his sternest voice. "We're not here to squabble. Just put aside your differences for the duration of this meeting, can't you?"

"I can if he can," muttered Penguin, folding his arms across his chest.

Two-Face reached into his pocket and flipped his coin into the palm of his hand. It landed good side up. "I can," he agreed.

"Honestly, Harvey, be a real man and think for yourself!" snapped Penguin.

Another round of insults was going to break out, thankfully interrupted by the door opening again. "Evening, all!" said the Riddler, Edward Nygma, cheerfully. "Gorgeous night, isn't it? I've just come from arranging an array of carefully constructed conundrums for our Dark Knight Detective."

"Speaking of not real men," muttered Penguin.

"Who, Bats or Nygma?" asked Two-Face, lighting a cigar.

"I heard that!" snapped Riddler.

"Thanks for offering cigars, Harvey," said Penguin, sarcastically.

"Why would I waste a fine Cuban on you?" demanded Two-Face. "You smoke your own inferior brand!"

"These are the brand Castro uses, hand rolled on the thighs of a Cuban virgin!" snapped Penguin, lighting his own cigar.

"Takes a virgin to know a virgin," retorted Two-Face.

"What's that supposed to mean?" demanded Penguin.

Two-Face shrugged. "Just saying, there are rumors going around that you employ scantily clad women for your clubs, but don't touch 'em yourself. Maybe you just don't swing that way, though, huh, Oswald?"

"Right, this is going in your good eye!" roared Penguin, preparing to stab the lit cigar into Two-Face's face.

"Stop it!" roared Crane, grabbing Penguin's arm. "No fighting! God, we're not even all here yet and it's already turning ugly!"

"Blame Ugly-Face here for that," growled Penguin.

"Last I checked, short, fat, bald, and a bottle stuck in your eye wasn't attractive," retorted Two-Face. "And I bet I still got more dames than you. I mean, I've had at least one, so that beats you…"

"Edward, tell us some more about your riddles, please," interrupted Crane, trying to keep the peace again, and knowing that nothing would take the energy out of the room like Nygma discussing his riddles.

"Gladly, Jonathan," said Nygma, smugly. "As revenge for my humiliation in Arkham Asylum and City, I've hidden several trophies all over Gotham. The Dark Knight cannot possibly find them all this time, nor can he complete my intellectually taxing challenges…"

"Who else are we expecting?" interrupted Two-Face.

"Harley and Ivy, assuming Harley was successful in rescuing her," said Crane.

"She was," said Penguin, nodding. "Contacted the little minx on her mission, to see if she wanted to work for me."

"Bet she told you to go to hell," muttered Two-Face, blowing out a cloud of smoke.

"She was less than enthusiastic," agreed Penguin. "But she'll come round. Everyone has their price, and a cheap tart like Harley shouldn't be too expensive."

"You will not call her that!" snapped Crane. "She is not a cheap tart! She's a vulnerable, grief-stricken young woman, and nobody in this room will say another cruel, false thing about her!"

"All right, Professor, no need to overreact," said Penguin. "Why would you care, anyway?"

"Somebody's sweet on Joker's girl," said Two-Face, grinning.

"I am not!" snapped Crane. "And she's not Joker's girl anymore - Joker is dead! And even if I was sweet on her, it's far too soon to even approach her…"

"Oh, I dunno, Craney!" chuckled Penguin. "It's been a good few months since the slut got a bit of rough. She's probably pretty desperate since they turned her lover's corpse to ashes - you could have her begging for your…"

"Thank you, that's enough!" interrupted Crane. "This meeting is not about Harley, or me, or a bit of rough! It's about killing the Batman!"

"Want me to see what's keeping the clown minx?" asked Penguin, holding up a radio.

"Thank you – I'll do it," snapped Crane, grabbing the radio from him. "Hello, Harley…"

"For the last time, you bird-brained creep, I ain't never gonna work for you, so just drop it! If you don't, when I get back I'll take this radio and shove it where the sun don't shine! I'm a one fella kinda gal, and I'll never work for anyone else but Mr. J! You hear me?! Never!"

"Harley…it's Jonathan," stammered Crane.

"Oh. Hi, Johnny," said Harley, in her normal, sweet tone. "Sorry I'm a little touchy, but squawky Cobblefeathers here has been getting on my nerves! He thinks I'll just forget all about Mr. J…"

"The whole world will be forgetting the psycho soon, love!" called Penguin. "He's six feet under!"

"What do you think that matters?!" shrieked Harley. "You think I'm gonna stop loving him just because he's dead?! You got a funny understanding of love, Osbald! And I'll never stop loving my Mr. J! Never!"

"Very good, Harley – just wondering where you are," said Crane, trying to change the subject hastily.

"Almost there. Got Red with me too."

"Well done, Harley," said Crane, sincerely. "I knew you could do it!"

"Pengers thought you should have sent a guy to bust her outta jail," said Harley. "Kept saying jailbreaks are a man's job. Well, it ain't the first time I've busted somebody outta the clink, and it won't be the last. I busted out…Mr. J…when we first…met…" she stammered, and Crane could hear the tears in her voice.

"I never doubted you for a second, Harley," said Crane, soothingly.

"That's only because he wants to get his hands on your…" began Penguin, but Crane switched off the radio suddenly.

"What did I say?!" he demanded.

"You poor, simple fools, squabbling amongst yourselves," sighed Nygma. "Over a stupid woman! The intellectually superior among us have realized that the presence of other human beings is not necessary for a successful scheme, nor for happiness."

"And that's why you don't have any friends," agreed Two-Face, nodding.

"No, I do not," said Nygma, proudly.

"None of us have any friends," muttered Crane. "We just have business associates. Friendship would imply a kind of love, and love is the fertile ground in which fear is planted. The seeds of it grow and grow as the love grows stronger, the fear that you will lose that love and be left a broken, miserable shell. And that is what we are going to do to Batman."

"Is that why you wanted the Weed Lady?" asked Penguin. "Because it's about plants?"

"It's a metaphor, you idiotic buffoon!" snapped Nygma.

"I think Miss Isley will prove herself useful – her natural ability with plants gives her an almost super-powered advantage over Batman," explained Crane. "And I want to have every advantage in this fight. Speaking of which…"

He knocked on the door. "Knight, how are your forces coming along?"

The Arkham Knight entered. "Got squadrons of men and drones flying in from South America. He's not gonna stand a chance."

"I certainly hope not, for your sake," said Crane, nodding. "I do not accept failure in my ranks."

"Don't worry, sir," replied the Arkham Knight. "Nothing is going to stop me from getting revenge on Batman. He owes me big-time, and I'll take it outta his miserable hide."

"Wishful thinking, Junior," said Two-Face. "We've all said that a million times. You think you can just show up in Gotham and take down the Bat just because you got a lotta fancy weapons and gear? It takes more than that."

"I know what it takes, old man," snapped the Arkham Knight. "I know Batman better than anyone here! I know how he thinks, I know his allies, and I know he's gonna die by my hand, because I'm the only one here with the brains, brawn, and balls to take him down."

"All right, c'mere, you little punk!" roared Two-Face, lunging forward with his fist raised.

"Harvey, please!" shouted Crane, stepping in front of the Arkham Knight. "Just calm down!"

"I dunno how you can work with the little brat, Johnny," muttered Two-Face, lowering his fist with colossal effort. "He's not like us. He's got no style, no class, so how can you trust him?"

"Because he has something more important – information," snapped Crane. "And that is more valuable to Batman's ultimate defeat than anything else. And because I have the brains to put aside my personal likes and dislikes for the greater good! Let's hope we can all do the same!"

Two-Face shrugged. "I guess if we already got style-less, classless guys like Cobblepot and Nygma here, we can do with one more."

Crane was about to fear gas them all as another loud argument broke out. But his remaining sanity was saved as the door opened and Harley Quinn and Poison Ivy entered.

"Thank God!" gasped Crane, rushing over to them. "Harley, my dear, I'm so glad to see you again, and let me just express my sincerest condolences on your terrible loss…"

"Thanks, Johnny," she whispered, gazing up at him with tears in her eyes. "It still hurts every day."

"I know, my dear," he said, gently. "If there was anything I could do to help stop the pain, believe me, I would do it. Anything at all."

"I would too, Johnny," she whispered. "But there ain't. And there ain't anything I can do to bring him back. He's gone forever, and I will never…be truly happy again!" she sobbed, bursting into tears.

Crane embraced her, soothing her gently, as Poison Ivy rolled her eyes. "For God's sake, Harley, just get over it!" she snapped. "She's been sobbing all the way back from Bludhaven! As if anyone could actually be upset that that waste of skin is dead!"

"He was not a waste of skin!" shrieked Harley, furiously, glaring at Ivy. "And I'd like to think my best friend could be a little sympathetic at the death of my one true love!"

"Sympathetic?!" repeated Ivy. "That the psychotic monster is dead?! I have tried to be sympathetic, Harley, for months on end! Who was there for every late night phone call and sobfest?! But I just can't stand seeing you wasting your emotions on that scumbag any longer! You need to woman up and move on! And I'm here too, Johnny – thanks for noticing!" she snapped, rounding on Crane. "You think if you send Harley to bust me outta Bludhaven jail, you could at least greet me!"

"I can see prison has not improved your temper, Pamela," retorted Crane.

"Yeah, she's always been like that," agreed Two-Face.

"Shut up, Harvey!" snapped Ivy. "God, I am so done with all of you! From now on, I'm sticking to only hanging out with plants! At least they shut up and don't cry!"

"I do hope that's not your decision before you've even heard my plan," said Crane.

"Let me guess – we're all gonna work together to destroy Batman," said Ivy. "We've got some great new ideas, and together, we all can't possibly fail. Well, here's a news flash for you, Professor – we will. Somehow he'll always find a way to win. That's just the way it is. I accepted that a long time ago, back in Arkham City, and now I'm staying out of the affairs of humans, including their petty squabbles and schemes against Batman!"

"I'm sorry to hear you so resolute," said Crane. "It's a sad day when a woman of your talents and abilities gives up. And frankly, I expected a little gratitude toward me for freeing you from jail. Such a favor should be repaid, don't you think?"

"I don't owe any walking meatsacks any favors," retorted Ivy. "I would've busted outta there eventually, with or without your help! But your arrogant sexism just couldn't resist rescuing a damsel in distress, could it, Crane? Typical man – always thinking women need to be rescued!"

"What are you talking about?" he demanded. "You were in prison! You _did_ need to be rescued!"

"I'm a strong, independent woman, and I rely on myself!" snapped Ivy. "And I don't need help or favors from any man!"

"That's not what you said to me a couple months ago," muttered Two-Face.

Ivy punched him suddenly, and once the first punch was thrown, the others quickly joined in, except for Harley, who just kept sobbing through the chaos. "Mr. J would've loved a supervillain punch-up!" she wailed. "He should be here! He would be laughing!"

"He ain't ever gonna be laughing again, love!" shouted Penguin, who was holding his cigar against Nygma's arm, who was shrieking in pain. Harley smashed her baseball bat across Penguin's face suddenly, eyes blazing in rage.

"Take it back! Take it back! Take it back!" she screamed, beating him.

"Calm down! Everyone! Sit down! Order!" shouted Crane. As a former professor, Crane was used to dealing with rowdy students, but he had never had to deal with homicidal students before, and his stern lecturer voice didn't seem to be working. He threw his hands up, ready to give up on the lot of them and go bang his head against a wall somewhere.

And then some shots were fired into the air, drawing everyone's attention. "Listen to me!" shouted the Arkham Knight, gun raised. "You are all going to stop fighting now! If you wanna tear each other to pieces, fine, but wouldn't you rather tear the Bat to pieces first? Because he's the only one I really wanna make suffer! And the only way we can do that is together! I don't like any of you, but my hatred for Batman is stronger than anything. And if we can all unite that hatred, the burning hatred we all have for him, we can destroy him. I know it."

"Why should we listen to you, kid?" demanded Two-Face.

The Arkham Knight shrugged, and then headed over to a computer. With a few clicks of the keys, he had isolated the location of the Clocktower in Gotham City, and with a few more, hacked into the security cameras. The villains all crowded around to see Batman talking to a red-haired girl in a wheelchair.

"Barbara Gordon," said the Arkham Knight. "Daughter of the Commissioner, and ally of the Dark Knight. We get her, we got Batman."

"He fears nothing more than losing those closest to him, those he puts in danger because of their association with him," murmured Crane. "He feels responsible for their fates. And we will hold him responsible for them. Batman's too strong to be broken physically – the key to breaking him lies in his mind. And the mind is a very weak and predictable thing where love is involved."

"Yeah, look at Harley," agreed Penguin. Harley slammed her bat across his face again.

"This could work," said Two-Face, slowly. "But how do you know so much about Batman and his friends, kid?"

The Arkham Knight shrugged again. "Let's just say we go way back."

Nygma snorted. "Well, I'm already planning on breaking Batman's mind with a serious of impossibly difficult challenges."

"That's excellent, Edward," said Crane, nodding. "I'm going to need each of you to play your part in wearing down his mind however you can. Use your criminal talents to distract and dizzy him, and leave me and the Knight to inflict the final, crushing blow."

"For Mr. J," whispered Harley, with tears in her eyes. "He's gotta pay for what he's done to Mr. J."

"And to the rest of us, who are, y'know, alive," retorted Penguin. "He's cost my criminal operations billions of dollars. I'm in."

"I'm not," snapped Ivy. "You all do whatever stupid scheme you want, but I'm telling you now it's gonna fail. I'm gonna spend my time fighting for Mother Nature from now on. She's the only one who matters."

"You're gonna turn your back on your friends, Red?" demanded Harley.

"Nobody here is my friend, Harley!" snapped Ivy.

Tears filled Harley's eyes again. "Red, I…I thought…"

"You thought that you could just put your friendship with me second to the clown all these years and I would just be happy with that?" demanded Ivy. "You thought you could just treat me like the clown treated you and expect me to be grateful for that?! I'm not as pathetic as you, Harley! Time and again you've proven your friendship with me is not a priority for you, so why should it be for me? You only use me for a shoulder to cry on, and force me to listen to your tearful breakdowns, but have you ever taken any interest in my life or my work when it doesn't relate to you?! It's a one-sided friendship, Harley, and frankly I don't care about it, or you, anymore."

Harley burst into tears again as Ivy turned and stormed away. And then suddenly fell to the ground unconscious as Harley's bat cracked across her skull. "All right, Ivy," whispered Harley, wiping away tears from her furious eyes. "Have it your way. But if you're not with us, you're against us."

"Well done, Harley," said Crane. "She can be our first piece of bait for Batman. He couldn't resist saving the life of even someone as inhuman as her."

"I'll take her to a safe location," said the Arkham Knight, hoisting Ivy over his shoulder and leaving the room.

"The rest of you, get out there and think up some distractions for Batman," said Crane. "I want him worn down as much as possible before I put my ultimate plan into fruition."

"What is your ultimate plan?" asked Nygma.

"All in good time, Mr. Nygma," said Crane, nodding. "You'll all find out in good time."

They all shuffled from the room. "Oh…Harley, might I have a word?" asked Crane, grabbing her arm before she could be the last one to leave. She turned back to him with tears streaming down her face.

"Yeah, Johnny?" she whispered.

"I just wanted to say…even if Ivy no longer wants to associate herself with that label…you still have friends," he said, gently.

"Do I?" she murmured, wiping her tears away. "Everyone I ever cared about has left me. Mr. J. Ivy…"

"Neither of those are your fault," said Crane. "You mustn't blame yourself…"

"I don't," she snapped. "I blame Batman for Mr. J, and I blame Ivy for her own decisions. And I'm gonna make 'em both pay."

"If there's anything I can do…" began Crane.

She looked at him. "Make 'em both suffer," she whispered. "Make 'em both afraid."

He nodded. "I promise."

"Thanks, Johnny," she whispered, kissing his cheek. "See you soon."

She left the room and Crane sighed happily. "This could not be going better!" he exclaimed to himself. "For once in my life, everything is going right! I will complete my work, and turn Gotham into a City of Fear! I will destroy the Batman, and I will make Harley happy by destroying him and Ivy! And nothing can possibly go wrong!"

These were famous last words, especially from supervillains in Gotham City. But Crane's felicitous circumstances had given him a positive, cheerful attitude and a new sense of hope. He had planned for every eventuality, every possible hole in the plan had been accounted for. There was simply no way he could lose.

"Sir?" said the Arkham Knight, returning. "Your newest batch of fear gas is ready at Ace Chemicals."

"Excellent," said Crane. "I will be over there soon."

"Apparently some of it leaked out, so you might want to inject yourself with an immunity before you go," said the Arkham Knight.

"Nonsense – I have filters in my mask," said Crane. "What the devil would I need an immunity for?"

"Well, what if your mask is removed somehow?" asked the Arkham Knight. "Or what if someone injects you with your chemical directly?"

"That hardly seems likely, does it, Knight?" demanded Crane. "Honestly, if we were going to plan for literally every possibility, we'd have to account for the possibility of an asteroid hitting the earth and wiping everything out! Let's just stick within the realms of the probable, shall we? Me, injected with my own toxin! What rubbish!"

The Arkham Knight might have valuable information, but his critical thinking skills left a lot to be desired, thought Crane. Thank goodness he was the brains of this operation.

 **The End**


End file.
